The English Dictionary defines jealousy as the feeling of envy towards another.
This trait could be very destructive and consuming. The Bible warns against the feeling of jealousy, though it is almost inevitable as humans but knowing what jealousy is and how to cope with it is something we should learn in order to maintain a healthier relationship with our friends, family and relationships.
Although it is normal to desire to be in successful places at different levels of our lives, but to allow oneself get consumed by such a distressing and negative emotion is damaging.
In your attempt to learn more about jealousy and what triggers the feeling, you have to find out more about its most basic categories which includes:
The healthy jealousy : this is not considered to be harmful as it is not difficult to deal with and overcome because it is only mild and occasional .
The destructive jealousy: this is something we should avoid as it makes one feel jealous in an intense irrational and frequent manner even the Bible condemns this type of jealousy in James 3:14-16 which says But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. [James 3] This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. [James 3]For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.
If we must live a life of utmost satisfaction then we have to learn to control and deal with this emotion.
Here are a few tips that help us deal with jealousy;
1. Get clear on what living with a purpose means to you. Eccl 3:1: Sometimes, we catch ourselves living each day as it comes without plans or strategies to make the day count and this makes us get envious cause we get idle and in turn dwell on the success of others without achieving our own goals. It is very wrong to live each day without a clearer understanding of what your purpose is. Find out who you truly are and work hard towards becoming that person God created you to be and you wouldn't have any room for jealousy in your heart because you'd be content.
2. Brainstorm on new ways to become more intentional with your time and habit Eph5:15-17, Jere 1:5:
You know what they say about an idle mind being the devil's workshop? I dare say, the major reason you feel jealous is because there is no vision map for your life because there is no way you'd be intentional about yourself.
3. Identify your priorities and focus on your strength and work on them Matt 6:33: when you set your priorities right, you’d be so concentrated that distraction becomes impossible.
4. Understand that jealousy is a wasted emotion and it is destructive James 3:14-16: if you know how much jealousy would cost you, you wouldn't want to activate that emotion at all James 3:16 made it very clear “ For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work.” Clear your heart of every envy and jealousy in order to strike a balance and live a fulfilled life.
5. Learn to be content, satisfied and grateful for what ever you have 1Tim 6:6-12: in my experience, I can tell you that the root of jealousy is discontentment, dissatisfaction and ingratitude . In order to cleanse your heart of jealousy, it is necessary to cultivate the habit of genuine gratefulness and satisfaction. All you have to do to do is express gratitude to God as Apostle Paul instructs in 1thes 5:18 “ In every thing give thanks: for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus concerning you.”
6. Grow closer to God and become more assured of the potential He placed within you Heb 4:8: The Best way to deal with jealousy is to pray about it and as you constantly speak to God in prayers, you begin to conform to the image of Christ and when that happens jealousy will no longer dwell within your hearth.
If your jealousy is directed to a particular person or a group of people, make an effort to shower that person or people with love and pray for God’s blessings over them. When we bless others, it releases love in our hearts towards them. Luke 6:28 says “ bless those that curse you and pray for those that mistreat you.”
When we are jealous towards someone, we view them as someone who is cursing us so this same principle applies. Again it might feel imperfect at first but as you obey the scripture God will meet you in your act of obedience and change your heart.
Here’s one parting thought proverbs 14:30 says that “Envy rots the bones.”
More and more medical studies are proving that when we harbor ill will, it actually affects us physically. God is a loving father and He wants you to overcome this sin for His glory and for your own well-being and happiness.
Staff Writer, Fortune Emenike